Embracing the Chaos

I grew up in a really, really clean house.  This was good in that it taught me the importance of order in the functioning of a household, but it also gave me some unrealistic expectations.  Try as I might, I just can't seem to keep things in our house like they were in mine growing up.  I'm sure this is a combination of the increasing complexity of our lives today, the fact that people simply have more stuff now (which is not a good thing, I realize) and the fact that I have two crazy little boys vs. the two comparatively docile girls my parents had.  Whatever the reason, I can't help but feel guilty that I just can't seem to make it work.  Its not too much fun to be unable to get everything done, and not satisfied until everything is done.  Yes, that does mean I'm never satisfied.  Like I said, not fun.

As much as I tell myself its important not to get too bogged down in the housework and just enjoy my kids, the nagging voice is always there that I need to be getting stuff done.  As I watch my kids though, I am beginning to understand that some of the good stuff in life lies in the messiness and chaos.  Yesterday, the kids and I were leaving the house and I stopped and took stock of the craziness around me -  little boys running through the backyard, picking up sticks and stones, looking at bugs, clambering into the car, scrambling into car seats and buckling harnesses, while Oliver talked incessantly and Emory jabbered away -  and I realized that this is it.  The busyness and energy of kids make everything disorderly, but each little moment is very full.  They  don't miss the chance to discover, explore and enjoy everything that they can.  Observing things like this helps me let go of a little of the stress I feel about maintaining order in our home.  If things in our lives are too structured, clean and organized, we miss out on some of the fun that messes create.

So, tonight when I made pumpkin pancakes - I love breakfast for dinner - I let Emory help as much as he wanted.  I always cook with the kids, but I'm not always very relaxed about the mess they make.  I let Emory explore the process how he wanted to (within reason, I did need the ingredients to mostly stay in the bowl) and he had a blast.  It only meant a couple of extra minutes of clean up for me and was totally worth it.

Going forward, I plan to make a conscious effort to better balance the benefits of chaos with the serenity of order.  We will all probably have a little more fun in the process.  Now to go mop the kitchen...